Frank the Frenchie // Le Portrait of Le Bulldog

When flipping through these pictures you might ask yourself, “Is this dog real?” or “How much did it cost to get such a life-like mechanical dog who doesn’t seem able to bend any of his limbs but makes such cute facial expressions?” We are here to assure you that Frank the Frenchie is, indeed real, and is living a cushy life in Raleigh, North Carolina where his lives with Jo, Brad, Laurel, and Sam (whom you might knot from “The Lake” part one, and “The Lake” part two). But this, my friends, is not about them. Well, it kind of is, but is mostly about Frank. He is their recently adopted Frenchie.

Johanna’s initial skepticism about owning a dog has turned into her sitting in the living room with Frank on her lap whispering in his ear, “Nobody loves you like I do,” so it’s safe to say he’s made quite an impression. He is small yet made entirely of muscle, which he will use to excitedly jump all over the place when you first arrive, and then collapse into an overheated heap in the exercise room while the family shouts, “He is overheating! Quick! Get him to some tile!” He is then placed on said cool tile and we wait while his batteries recharge, and then he comes barreling out of the room with his tongue stuck out again. Frank makes a constant audible noise while he breathes, and stares constantly into space. It’s like he can see into the Upside Down all the time or has been spending a lot of time on the road with the Grateful Dead. He is 100% malleable and uses 0% of his energy to do anything except overheat himself when you initially arrive, and occasionally chase balls. He owns his own Casper bed and enjoys eating ice chips from the fridge.

HOW CAN I SEE MORE OF THIS DOG, you might ask. Well, Frank has his own Instagram account where he’s actively trying to gain more followers so that he and Gary Fisher can become fast friends. I love Frank. And these people here love Frank. And so should you.

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